911: Police, Fire, or Ambulance?
BMW: POLICE! My car was just hit by one of those scofflaws and he left the scene.
911: OK sir please calm down. Are you injured? Can you tell me what happened and your location.
BMW: I am not injured but my car has hit by a cyclist, he has done a lot of damage. He got back on his bike and took off. South bound on George St...right through a stop sign...um... he was dressed all ratty like with a bag on his shoulder.
911: Ok sir we have an officer enroute. Was the cyclist injured?
BMW: Who cares! Look what he has done to my car! Those damn cyclists think they have the right to break the law. They need license plates! I was just going in to get my morning coffee! IS THIS CITY NOT SAFE ENOUGH TO PICK UP YOUR MORNING COFFEE? Are you going to arrest that cyclist?
911: Sir, the officer has arrived but cannot find you. Are you the BMW parked in the bike lane.
BMW: No. My car is parked on the sidewalk outside Tim Hortons. What is he blind?!